Archive for August, 2009

A Young Couple Evaluates Their Excessive and Hazardous Drinking and Their Short and Long-Term Dreams, Hopes, and Plans

August 25th, 2009 by writer | Posted in General   Comments Off

Augie and Merissa have been seeing one another for eight years. They met while taking the same statistics class at a relatively large, rural, private liberal arts college located in the Eastern part of the United States. While they were just good pals at first, they eventually began dating when they were in their first year of college.

Given the fact that both of them came from very strict backgrounds, neither one of them drank very much beyond the casual drinking stage when they first began dating. As the time advanced, then again, they began to go to more keg parties, football bashes, sorority and fraternity parties, and happy hours. As a consequence, they little by little began to drink more as they proceeded in their relationship.

Their Social Life As a Rule Consisted of Going to Restaurants Three or Four Nights Per Week, Going to Professional Sporting Events, Going to Happy Hour With Their Friends, Going to Parties With Their Friends, and Going With Their Friends to the Local Disco on the Weekends

After they graduated, they both found jobs in a medium size city located roughly seventy miles from their undergraduate college. Then they decided to move into the same apartment with one another.

Because they were far removed from the college drinking scene, nonetheless, their social life generally consisted of going to restaurants three or four nights per week, going to professional sporting events, going to parties with their friends, going to happy hour with their friends, and going to the local bar with their buddies on the weekends. To come to the point, Merissa and Augie started to drink in an abusive manner.

Now that were living with one another and starting to get more unwavering about their relationship, nevertheless, they started to think about having children, becoming more responsible, getting married, and buying a house.

With any momentous adjustment in a person’s life there is normally something that produces the particular change in question. For Merissa and Augie the thought of having children and buying a new house was this “catalyst.” Stated more forcefully, for the first time in their lives, Merissa and Augie started to critically evaluate their hazardous and abusive drinking and the alcohol long term effects on their lives.

How Would Their Hazardous Drinking Affect Their Finances, Their Relationship With One Another, Their Ability to Have Children, Their Mental Health, and Their Relationship With Their Parents?

Would their drinking behavior negatively affect their ability to have children? How would they be able to continue spending most of their money on drinking if they were to start saving for a new house? How mature would they be if they had children and continued to drink in a hazardous and irresponsible manner? How would they be able to face their parents and tell them about their long term aspirations, goals, and dreams while they still drank in an irresponsible and hazardous manner while having fun as they did when they were in college? What would their abusive and irresponsible drinking do to their relationship? How would their heavy and irresponsible drinking affect their mental health?

From a different viewpoint, although neither one of them ever suffered from alcohol poisoning, received a DUI, or experienced alcohol withdrawal symptoms, they realized that their excessive and heavy drinking was becoming a troublesome issue that they could not turn their backs on anymore.

After Giving Their Situation Some Serious Thought, Merissa and Augie Grasped the Fact That Their Hopes, Aspirations, and Dreams Would not be Fulfilled if They Continued Their Hazardous and Excessive Drinking

All of these questions unmistakably resulted in the same conclusion: Augie and Merissa needed to be more aware that they couldn’t continue their abusive and heavy drinking if their dreams, goals, and aspirations were to be made real.

Once they settled upon this conclusion, they told their drinking pals about their plans to start a family, about their goal of buying or building a new house, and about their marital plans. They also told their drinking pals that they still wanted to associate with them but that they would be drinking in strict moderation from this point forward so that they could begin realizing their future hopes, dreams, and plans.

Unexpectedly, all of their pals expressed relief because they too had been pondering the direction of their lives and concluded that their life-styles were much too frequently focused on drinking. They also understood that they would have to change radically if they were to become more mature and manifest more respect for their health, their careers, and for their goals in the next five or ten years.

After their frank discussion with their buddies about their goals, aspirations, and dreams, Merissa and Augie in reality started to have more meaningful relationships with all of their pals. The primary reason for this was the fact that all of them had the same way of thinking regarding their irresponsible and excessive drinking and their relatively short and long-term goals, aspirations, and plans.

Don’t Fall Short – Buy Perfect Presents Every Time

August 20th, 2009 by writer | Posted in General   Comments Off

A great way to show somebody you care about them is by giving them a gift. Whether your giving this to mark a special occasion or maybe just to let them know you care, presents are something that you should take time selecting.

The main reason why you should take your time with these gifts is because it really can say a lot about your relationship with the recipient. Rather than just buying the first thing you see, it is always is better to think about the person who is receiving the present and think about what they will like.

One of the most common misconceptions regarding presents is that you have to spend a lot of money to make them be a good one. Typically this is not the case. Although sometimes the best present for someone happens to be costly, there are plenty of gifts that are inexpensive and the receiver will really appreciate and like.

To make your gift count, firstly you should consider the occasion. If this is for a romantic occasion, then you should think about going for meaningful gifts that say something about your relationship – anniversary presents can sometimes be tricky.

On the other hand, if this gift is for christmas or another special occasion, consider thinking about what type of hobbies the person has. If they like something such as reading, then think about buying them a book that would really appeal.

You can use this method even if your giving presents to people you do not know too well. Take some time to think about their characteristics and go from there. Because your gifts or gift sets will show that you put at least a little bit of effort into it.

When it comes to the holidays, virtually everyone has trouble to find the right gift for everyone on their list. More often than not people get to the point where they have run out of time so just buy last minute gifts.

Even if you have to buy a last minute present, you still can make this meaningful for the receiver. All you need to do is use the same methods as before. Think about what they like to do for fun and buy a quick gift off of that. Just as long as you put some thought into it, it will show.

Online Dating Hides True Identity

August 18th, 2009 by writer | Posted in General   Comments Off

It doesn’t matter who the person behind the computer screen actually is. Online dating offers the possibility of hiding the past and welcoming the future. When we date a new person found online, we can be who ever we want to be, even a person that has no past and memories. But in most cases people do not understand where the limit between hiding sad stories and actually lying is.

You might even encounter old persons, maybe even grandmothers that claim they are young and athletic. And if she posts any pictures of another young and gorgeous woman, no can really say if it’s her or not. That is why it’s indicated that you study the profiles well and don’t believe just any picture you see. There’s nothing wrong with a 50 year old person trying to find a soul mate online, but the fact that the person is trying to hide his or hers real identity is a problem.

Do try not to jump to conclusions too soon. First info and data are scarce in any website. On online dating website, you can find reasonable and not so reasonable persons. Nevertheless, finding your right date will slowly become a fun and exact process.

Like it’s outlined above, you could become a new person, but do it without having to tell a lie. Internet dating gives us something we all need: a future with no past. You might’ve been through a hell of a marriage, that left huge inner scars, and if you want to talk about it over the internet you can without feeling embarrassed, but if you don’t, no one will ask. Just a simple resume of your past is enough. If our dating partner comes from any real life environment, then he or she will probably know what we’ve been through and the relationship will hand the other person an advantage. So, in real life dates, forgetting who you were can prove to be very hard. While on internet chats, this will probably never happen, because online dates are not so specific about paste events. But remember to keep some truths in place if a baby britax roundabout car seat is something you are looking forward to.

Make your best not to cross the line between protecting yourself and lying. The two concepts can get scrambled at times, and they will result in unfortunate experiences for both of you.

What you can do when your relationship falters

August 17th, 2009 by writer | Posted in General   Comments Off

One of the best things we get to experience in our lives is relationships.From the wonderful experiences of family relationships to love relationships it is great.But in a few instances what was once good can turn bad.  What was once a source of joy and excitement can become hard and painful.

I have seen this first hand helping people in couples counseling San Diego. What was once a promising relationship becomes antagonistic.  What was once looking like a bright future now is so bleak.What occurred and what is there that can be done to fix it?

That is a big question and hard question to answer.Every struggling relationship will have different sets of circumstance.  But my experience as a marriage counselor San Diego has shown me there are methods you can use to bring out good solutions.

One of the things I help them with is a safe environment.Most of the times when you try and address the problems at your house it just won’t work.By proving a safe environment for them they are able to feel comfortable and safe which allows them work things out easier.

Another thing that can help the couple is by being an ear for them.  But not just an ear but an impartial ear.  An ear that will listen to the issues and address them impartially.Accomplishing that can work miracles.  That third person can address the issues apart from a heated argument.When a couple is in the heat of the argument and they try to fix it, it usually won’t work.

Another thing that the couple can be helped with is by teaching them how to listen to each other.  In my practice doing marriage counseling San Diego, I help them develop these skills.  These skills help them hear each other out rather than always trying to win the point.

By implementing this, they are more able to tackle the issues that face them. Doing these few things in a rocky relationship can work wonders.I have seen it in action countless times as a marriage counselor.

Encouraging Someone Who Needs It

August 16th, 2009 by writer | Posted in General   Comments Off

Take a few minutes to read this article if you are trying to help someone who is in pain due to the loss of a loved one, break-up, divorce or what ever type of pain.

Often times we feel like sharing encouraging words to someone who is hurting is useless. In most instances when youspeak daily bible verses for encouragement the person may seem to discount them while continuing to bask in the painful feeling.

Despite everything else, everyone needs some words that can encourage her or him. Relaying such words is more like when you plant a seed. It can take sometime before you see the full results of your hard labour.

Likewise when you try to help someone get through a bad situation, do not just give up at the first try even if you don’t see any positive results at first. Don’t stop sharing Christian words of encouragement if you can and don’t dare give up.

It may be that the person who is hurting is still fresh from the ordeal and needs time to digest everything. Exercise some patience and understanding. Also, you need to keep in mind that people grieve in different ways and the time taken varies – depending on the occurrence or the nature of the grieving person.

I have a friend who lost a loved one and spent two years still mourning and crying everyday before going to bed. It turned out everything we kept saying to him over the years – in terms of encouragement, helped him to heal eventually. We didn’t know we were making that kind of an impact at the time.

So no matter how useless you think it is to thinking about writing sample letters of encouragement for your loved one remember that they are helping him or her to live through each passing day. Stay strong and never stop sharing positively into your friend’s life until you see a positive change.

Christian Online Dating Service to the Rescue

August 15th, 2009 by writer | Posted in General   Comments Off

It is now easy to find a Christian match with same religious beliefs as yours, with the help of online Christian Dating service. This service is only for Christians who have strong religious beliefs and are looking for a partner with the same qualities.

There are some great options out there when it comes to an online Catholic dating service, and it is nice to know that you already have one thing out of the way when you are talking to people and that is that they believe in God.

Christian Café

One of the most popular online Christian dating websites options out there. If you are looking for a Christian match and are willing to make that person a special one in your life, then Christian Dating service finds the solution to it. Regardless of you being a single or a divorcee, the Christian Café has the answer to what exactly you are looking for.

Christian Dating service allows you to take a free 10 day trial from the day of subscription. In this way the members can use it for a while and see if it suits their requirements.

They are a premier Christian singles Irish dating site, and they are a comfortable website that is easy to browse through and you can find that perfect person whether that means a friend or a partner.

Christian Mingle

Christian Mingle website is a one stop paradise for people that wish to experience a perfect online Christian dating service. Your search for an online Christian dating site ends here. They are one of the best and most popular in the industry. They offer a website that works on the grounds of social networking thereby allowing Christian singles to meet new friends and partners.

Signing up on different online Christian dating websites gives you ample options to choose from. Signing-up on multiple sites opens a gateway to unlimited singles, which leaves you with many options.